Who am I gonna be today?

Will you hear what I have to say?

Or will I listen to the doubt and shame

and run away from all my pain?

Could you love me anyway?

Wanna believe what you keep saying

Listen to your voice when I can’t see,

when I can’t live the words I sing

Can I give you my all, my everything?

Cuz’ you love me anyway

You take me as I am

Just as I am

How can I be holy?

Hold out your hand again

I still don’t understand

what it means to be holy

Born to the flesh, to life and death

Risen high and glorified,

eternal hunger satisfied

One with each other,

we walk together, you and I

Dark hallway and door

Sliding locks

This empty hall, the cracking floor

your breaking heart – the lock, the door

You let yourself get in too deep

you didn’t ask to be set free

It was so hard to let her in

behind a veil, she took your hand

both tried your best to play the parts

but fear betrays conflicted hearts

Life isn’t easy, clean or nice

Love is pain and it’s sacrifice

Love is a war – nothing is fair

you stand, you fall – you’re in repair

Pray hope will call on joy, her friend

Beauty and light will steel again

Your heart will heal,

love will endure

Just slide your lock -

Open the door

soul chasing

daylight abandons without warning

darkness all around, keep running

you’re gonna be okay

we’re gonna be okay

it’s not easy moving forward

without a glimpse of what’s ahead

moonlight piercing through the darkness

reviving souls – the quick, the dead

we’re gonna be okay

not alone tonight

yea we’re gonna be okay

we’re gonna be okay

eyes adjusting to the night

chasing souls in the moonlight

reveal the ground beneath you

another step towards the truth

you’re gonna to be okay

not alone tonight

yea you’re gonna be okay

you’re gonna be okay

love remains

earth sinking under my feet

mountains ebb below the sea

I’m blind, I’m lost now – won’t you speak?

joy takes flight with sister peace

 my strength is gone, I’m all alone

I yearn for you – please call me home

pull me in and hold my heart

your love remains when my world is falling apart

calm this storm, the pain, my soul

I’ve been too weak to let it go

from my knees I cry for you

my still, my dark, my solitude

my hope I ache for you alone

I hear my name, I’m running home

hold me close, you have my heart

your love remains when my world is falling apart

Joy & Pain

You say you want to be heard

For your soul to shine

You say you want to be known

And find meaning in your life

Always searching for a sign

It’s not what you can get or earn, or gain

Look inside and you’ll find

Love is two parts joy and two parts pain

Learn to live and give yourself

Open your heart, your eyes and mind

Time can heal, or that clock just may drive you insane

Those hands, they don’t stop moving

Then love runs to meet you in the pain

And those arms, they don’t stop holding

They won’t stop holding you

Love is the reason you’re alive

Our Great Escape

Do you ever feel the need to escape? Human nature can drive us to flee the monotony of life. When boredom sets in, we’ll say we’re “stuck in a rut” and try almost anything to break free. We’ll immerse ourselves in the distant stories of fantastic, non-fiction world of Harry Potter; we obsess over the hyper-publicized and often tragically Cast of Harry Potter film seriesbroken lives of celebrities like Kim Kardasian and Tiger Woods; we dream about vacations to exotic lands like the Island of St. Thomas or Fiji.

I always look forward to beach vacations with my family as a way to escape the drain of the mundane. It’s nice to get away and spend time with loved ones, unobstructed by the busyness of life. Oh, to not set an alarm in the morning, but wake up to the smell pancakes and scrambled eggs – there’s nothing like hot breakfast made by mom and dad! (Of course, Christine’s pancakes are still the best!) I wonder if that is but a glimpse of what life would be like in a perfect world…


To not set an alarm in the morning, but wake up to the smell pancakes and scrambled eggs - there's nothing like hot breakfast made by mom and dad!

But life in reality is dirty, isn’t it? Lives of the highest standards have been invested to pursue philosophic treasures; yet history has shown that, in reality, humanity will inevitably fall short of the political ideals for which it fights. If that is the case then, for us, perfection may be best defined as a process in which we choose to either participate or not.

Realizing that perfection cannot be achieved (at least on this side of eternity), we are in danger of giving up entirely our pursuit of ideals. We may find comfort in the status quo, and thus choose to concentrate our efforts toward its conservation. Instead of striving to escape the monotony, we dig our heels in the sand: we’ve weighed the costs, and the potential gains are not worth the personal risks of venturing into uncharted territory. But worrying about our own needs can blind us, disabling us from seeing how we fit in the bigger picture of God’s reconciliation with all of creation.

Fortunately (and unfortunately), for those of us that still pursue the unattainable, Jesus’ teaching is clear:

Just then a man came up to Jesus and asked, “Teacher, what good thing must I do to get eternal life?”

“Why do you ask me about what is good?” Jesus replied.“There is only One who is good. If you want to enter life, keep the commandments.”

“Which ones?” he inquired.

Jesus replied, “‘You shall not murder, you shall not commit adultery, you shall not steal, you shall not give false testimony, honor your father and mother,’ and ‘love your neighbor as yourself.'”

 “All these I have kept,” the young man said. “What do I still lack?”

Jesus answered, “If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.”

When the young man heard this, he went away sad, because he had great wealth.

 Then Jesus said to his disciples, “Truly I tell you, it is hard for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of heaven. Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God.”

What if the only way to truly escape the monotonous is to change ourselves? Or are we so “rich” with distractions that we have lost sight of Christ as the way, the truth, and the life? It’s time for us to stop running from his saving, renewing, and transforming love. So lift your heels out from the sand… and take a step of faith.